When you've lost all your clothes the phrase, "I have nothing to wear" takes on new meaning. I'm working hard to regenerate my wardrobe but it's a struggle. Part of my problem is that I don't want to look like everyone else. On the tram to and from work, I am surrounded by hoards of identically dressed women, none of whom have a style I want to even come close to emulating. Think: Marina chick in a southern Californian mall. On a good day, I'll see a couple of women wearing an outfit that I like, which makes for pretty slim pickin's inspiration-wise and complicates this whole fill-up-the-wardrobe thing. When I try to go shopping, I end up rejecting over 90% of the clothes most shops have on offer. It's all the same! It's all U-Glee! And then there's the fight against the urge to buy the safe clothes, the things that look good but bore me to tears.
After reading this article, I realized that what I'm actually struggling with is defining my own style. I have never - NEVER - been a style junkie, or a fashionista, or someone who can name more than three labels - and that's on a good day. My uniform until a few years ago was a t-shirt and jeans. Now I own heels and even occasionally wear them. Admitting that I do appreciate clothes and want to feel confident in what I'm wearing has been a big step for me. Actually leaving the safe comfort of t-shirts and jeans for clothes that are stylish and opinionated is one hell of a struggle.
One of the first steps is admitting that I like clothes. Hi, my name's Bartlebee and I like clothes. Having never been to AA, I'm not sure what comes next. Perhaps recognizing that fashion does matter, that what I wear does matter, and, most importantly, that it's ok that it matters. This part is a work in progress.
6 comments:
According to wikipedia and 12step.org, your progression would look like this:
1. We admitted we were powerless over clothes—that our lives had become unmanageable.
2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed with our bad wardrobe, and became willing to make amends to them all.
9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to the poorly dressed, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.
Hmmm. I don't think that's going to go over too well with you...
Oh, and apologies if "You're wearing that?!?" stunted your growth in this area for a few years... ;-)
yeah, i never had a problem admitting that i liked clothes. i had a problem wearing clothes that liked *me*, but that's another thing. The next big step is being willing to pay for them and shop outside of thrift stores and consignment shops. They can- of course- be fabulous places to go. But you know what? if i can't find a good pair of jeans in Goodwill for $10, then i'm going to find a good pair of jeans and pay full price for them. and that's what i'm wearing right now- my first pair of Lucky's that look good and feel good and cost $78 (ok, not full price. 20% off). gulp! ok, granted i will not do this for every pair of pants i need, but i'm over the guilt part of it. done.
Step 13. Head to Barney's (OK, maybe that doesn't work for a woman in Australia).
You could always ask each of your friends in the US to send one article of clothing in your size as a care package. We have a pretty good sense of your style.
I see the galaverse has been rubbing off on you, eh?
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